weird, man, i met that girl about 2 summers ago at good world on orchard. she was sitting at the bar, clad in jeans and a lifetime hoodie, pink squeeze in hand. i was starting to ask if i could sit next to her when she grabbed me by the collar and literally dragged me outside. i just wanted to stay for, i don’t know, twenty, thirty minutes? she told me that we were running out of time, and before i knew it i was in the backseat of a corsica with one of her cats and a half-eaten pizza. “where are we even going?” “don’t worry about it, just listen to this.” she popped in a cassette and the score from ‘the little mermaid’ reverberated through the musty car interior. she claimed it came with her whip, back in ‘88 when she bought it new. “how is that possible?” i asked. “that movie hasn’t even-” “JUST SHUT UP AND LET ME DRIVE.”

hours later, we ended up in the outskirts of charleston, west virginia. it was a beautiful sight, the sun coming up over the horizon. all was tranquil and hushed. and then her cell phone went off. it was the most awful ringtone in the world. i couldn’t quite make out what it was supposed to sound like. imagine a number of screaming babies impaled atop iron gates scraping sidewalks. it was like that, but a hundred times worse. it didn’t look like she was interested in picking up, and i silently prayed that call would go to voicemail. i’d never been a particularly religious person, but i guess things really do happen that change you.

when it finally stopped ringing, she offered me a cheeseburger. was this some sort of sign from a higher being? what was i supposed to do now? drop everything and study the word around the clock? i was still paying off my pratt loans, working at p.f. chang’s, courting a long-haired divorcée nearly twice my age. was i really ready to do this?

“i can’t take that,” i said. she squeezed my knee. “then i guess i’m going to have to take you back home.” it felt wrong. to this day i’ve made a conscious effort not to touch other people’s knees.

we drove until noon, and she left me at the lexington entrance of the gramercy park hotel. i didn’t have the heart to tell her i was from north jersey. i took a few trains home and spent the rest of the day in bed watching tiara girls.

anyway, cool post, good to see she’s alive and well

i’d like to make sweet love to her, her sunglasses, and that 40. Nick, set that up.